A friend of mine jokingly likes to say "I suffer from ADS - Attention Deficit SHINY!". We all recognize that distracted quality when we see it in conversation with another. And it's humbling to realize how, when all I have set is the simple task of focusing on my breathing, my mind displays full-blown Attention Deficit SHINY.
Many great ideas tonight - which was not exactly the goal. But one new development: I was in the middle of a very emotional thought. The emotion attached to the thought was unease about change. I dropped the story/thought, got interested in how the emotion felt somatically, relaxed my muscles and breathed into it.
I was wracked with involuntary shudders and a tear or two. There was no attempt to choke off either of these phenomena. There was no judgment. Just a curiosity. The moment felt like it was probably important. And soon enough it was gone, as I became distracted by the idea of making gluten-free, organic, 100-mile muesli.
Attention Deficit SHINY!
Sounds like you're on the way to true meditation - good work.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the encouragement. Persistence helps.
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